The line: “Some long ago when we were taught, that for whatever kind of puzzle you’ve got, you just stick the right formula in, a solution for every fool”
I am so grateful for the Indigo Girls. Their music is just amazing, and this line in particular has stood out to me over the years.
I have fallen in this trap so many times in my life, in my career, of just wanting the answer!
Can someone just tell me what I should do to get to that next destination?!
Do I need another course?
Which certification should I get that will help me be qualified?
When would I ever feel like I’ve arrived, like I could stop and feel like I’ve finally got to where I want to get to?
But then also: when, please, can I rest? Because I’m so so tired of all the seeking.
Here’s the thing: there is no formula. And I don’t think any of us are fools; so often we just doubt and lose touch with our own wisdom. We think and believe that there are people who know better, who can tell us - just do this, and then you’ll be all right.
The problem with that is, that each of us on this planet is an individual. There is no formula for what would make each of us happy, content, satisfied, and fulfilled.
It will be different, because we’re all different.
For so long I was striving for the next thing. I consumed so much learning that podcast audio must have been falling back out of my ears I was overloading my brain so much.
Stacks of books from the library, full of answers to questions. And then I’d just feel guilty because of late fees - when could I ever have enough time to take in, process, and digest all these answers for the questions I was asking?
Recently, I’ve tried to pump the brakes on that effort. I’ve been working hard to do less.
What if the answers to my most important questions are not going to come from a book, or a podcast, or an infographic, or someone else’s LinkedIn post?
What if the answers are within me?
What if there is no formula?
What would I do then?
How would I, to use Mary Oliver’s term, design my own wild and precious life?
For anyone looking for the formula, I hope that what I’m about to say can give you some ease. There isn’t one formula. There is, however, your way. Your way to find more ease, more confidence, more trust in yourself, more self-belief.
There is a way to be a loving presence to yourself, to help that seeking part of you know that you’re enough.
The Indigo Girls are the most thoughtful, wise, and talented songwriters I’ve ever known. And when they sing, and share their wisdom, I listen closely. And then I go out, and I try to be me.
Not someone else. Me.
I hope that you could try this too, to be you.
To be unapologetically you.
To stop looking for a formula from outside, and to know that the blueprint is yours to create from within.
It’s already created, in fact. You just have to trust it’s there and give yourself permission to see it and let it guide you.
Love from the Jukebox